__BACK__


Real Life


Anything that goes on in your life can go here.
WARNING: Mature content possible. Proceed with caution.

so........a 13 yr old girl commited suicide at a school near i live (and attended...,)and the family set up a gofundme, page. so 2 days ago they want $15,000, yet have not shut the gofundme page down. they will have $100k by morning i think.. i know its good to give to people but i feel like its not good for this situation to have more. I gave to the gofundme because i was sad because i went to the school...but it seems like this people are taking advantage of that suicide. i message them on their gofundme page to maybe take it off because it seems distasteful and i got hate-mail..do you agree with me?

settingsOptions
There are 16 Replies

Personally, I wouldn't give to it (especially not if they have thousands of dollars already), but there's a lot of costs involved with someone close you you dying, especially if you're responsible for them. In cases of suicide, especially with a young person, it can be very hard to let go. A decent funeral, the culturally relevant ritual involved in the process of grieving, can cost thousands of dollars.

And I definitely wouldn't message them with an accusation of trying to profit off of a family members' suicide. The people donating to them are adults and are capable of making their own decisions. Just because people decided to give them money does not mean that the family is manipulating them.

Posted December 5th by nullfather
nullfather

i just hope one day people can stop commiting suicide. and am glad i helped them with the furneral cost, but now they are about to reach 100k it just seems excessive to me. btw i didnt accuse them of profiting off the tradgey, i just said 'haven't you met your goal?' basically but longer than that. but what if she was your daughter? wouldn't you feel somewhat guilty taking money, when its partially your fault for her death because you didnt want over her?

Posted December 5th by Brandy
Brandy

I don't agree with sending messages suggesting to remove the gofundme. As nullfather stated, the people donating can choose to donate or not for their own reasons. I very much doubt that they are happy about any of it.

EDIT 1

wouldn't you feel somewhat guilty taking money, when its partially your fault for her death because you didnt want over her?


Okay well do you really know that the parents are at all to blame? If not that's a very bold accusation.

Edited December 5th by Vandy
Vandy

wouldn't you feel somewhat guilty taking money, when its partially your fault for her death because you didnt want over her?


What the fuck is wrong with you?

how do you know they are to blame?

And I see nothing wrong with it. Funerals are expensive as hell. For all you know they might donate the extra money to suicide prevention efforts.

Posted December 5th by S.O.H.
S.O.H.
 

not i dont know if they are to blame, but if you a parent you can sense when something is wrong with your child. espically if you raised her for 13 years, you can tell that something is different.. people just dont decide one day to kill themself.

Edited December 5th by Brandy
Brandy

not i dont know if they are to blame, but if you a parent you can sense when something is wrong with your child. espically if you raised her for 13 years, you can tell that something is different.. people just dont decide one day to kill themself.


sometimes it isnt that clear. some one can seem pretty happy and normal even when you ask them whats wrong and try to make sure they are okay. its pretty fucked up to put the blame on them. the hell is wrong with you.

Posted December 5th by S.O.H.
S.O.H.
 

Do you know that there was an actual precedent for the victim's thoughts and that the family knew and that they didn't try to help?

Posted December 5th by nullfather
nullfather

Okay well that in no way defaults blame on the parents. We don't know anything about what was going on. The parents may have been aware and were trying to help. We don't always need to look for someone to blame.

Also like SOH stated - many times when this happens you will only hear about how happy the person seemed. Signs are not always obvious.

Edited December 5th by Vandy
Vandy

Do you know that there was an actual precedent for the victim's thoughts and that the family knew and that they didn't try to help?

no.. am sorry you are all right, i dont know what am thinking. i just saw all the money they have got and thought it was wrong. soh nothing is wrong with me i shouldnt of said that

Posted December 5th by Brandy
Brandy

So, blaming the family is way out of line here, but them accepting 100k is all kinds of excessive. Do you have any idea what they're using the extra money for?

Posted December 5th by Xhin
Xhin
 

ut them accepting 100k is all kinds of excessive.

I dont think so. For all we know they could use that money for psychological counseling/ grieve counseling etc etc. Not sure how much those services cost with out insurance. But judging from medical costs these days I wouldnt be surprised if 75k was needed to cover the costs.

Posted December 5th by S.O.H.
S.O.H.
 

Do you have any idea what they're using the extra money for?

no they just said a goal of 15,000 for burial and medical expeneses. typical funeral cost are 5,000 – 15,000 i think. what they use the extra money is up to them

Posted December 5th by Brandy
Brandy

I dont think they intentionally wanted to profit from the suicide. It just sorta happened. I am sure that they would exchange that money in a heart beat to bring their child back to life.

Posted December 5th by S.O.H.
S.O.H.
 

not i dont know if they are to blame, but if you a parent you can sense when something is wrong with your child.


My parents have always been amazing to me. I attempted suicide when I was 15 years old, and they had no clue anything was wrong. People can be crafty at covering things up.


To answer the original question, though: I don't really see much of an issue here. They reached out to the community to meet a particular goal for something that costs an obscene amount of money, and the community responded by being overly generous. With a stated goal of basically the cost of funeral and other end-of-life services, I don't know you can say they clearly set out to profit off the tragedy. And who knows? Maybe they'll use the extra donations to buy better services, or set up a scholarship, or donate to some suicide prevention organization. I'm assuming you've revisited the page to see there's no new updates?

But also, people likely donated for many reasons. When something like this happens, people will give in support of the family, not necessarily just to provide coverage for funeral costs.

but them accepting 100k is all kinds of excessive.


Accepting donations people have given them, though. I get it, that's a lot of money, but is it really wrong to accept the donations people are willing to give you?


Posted December 5th by Jet Presto
Jet Presto

What exactly did you send to them to elicit the hate mail? Did you happen to include the tidbit about their daughter's suicide partially being their fault?

Posted December 5th by Agis
Agis
 

no i wouldnt do that..am not that cruel. i was basically just telling them that maybe they should stop accepting donations since they reached their limit and how i know it can be expensive and about peoples hard earned money etc and i guess people percieved it to be cruel but was not trying to be.

Posted December 5th by Brandy
Brandy
Reply to: Profiting off suicide? Is it okay?

Enter your message here


Site Rules | Complaints Process | Register Complaint Facebook Page
GTX0 © 2009-2017 Xhin GameTalk © 1999-2008 lives on