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Popcorn
Posted: Posted March 2nd
Edited March 2nd by Famov

Consider this a public service announcement.

Do your popcorn on the stove. There is no reason not to, as the following reasons I'm about to offer will demonstrate.

1. It tastes better. Microwave popcorn tends to have a faux butter additive (unless you're buying light microwave popcorn, in which case there is no hope for you ) which is okay if you're not adding real butter, but of course you're adding real butter, and since you're doing it on the stove anyway you'll have a hot pan primed to melt the butter in an instant. If you're so worried about calories that you weren't going to use real butter then you should've eaten carrots or fiber pills or whatever health conscious people usually sustain themselves on. Put butter on you popcorn, like a real man or woman.

2. It's probably healthier, even with the butter! I can't verify this but I haven't tried and I don't care.

3. It's easy. It takes all of one or two extra minutes to do on the stove, and you'll have one pan to wash, and I don't even have a dishwasher. There will also be no bag to throw away, which will something something carbon footprint.

4. It's much less expensive. For a couple of dollars you get a bag of kernels that will make you the equivalent of several *boxes* worth of microwave popcorn. The financial gain here is incredible, and should be enough to convince any self respecting person to make the switch even without the other compelling reasons on display here.

5. NO LEFTOVER KERNELS. The worst thing with microwave popcorn is that half of the bag is left unpopped, leaving you with the unenviable task of either throwing it away or trying to pop the rest and inadvertently burning it. This doesn't happen with stovetop popcorn. With the secret ingredients of vegetable oil and the unfailing human spirit you will make a bowl of popcorn with ZERO unpopped kernels. How is this not a revelation? Why did I have to go 28 years before discovering this?

I think I've made my case. You win, your lady friend wins, the overly subsidized corn industry probably doesn't win but who cares about them anyway? Make stovetop popcorn great again, and so on. You have no excuse.



You know who you are!

There are 19 Replies

i don't like popcorn, but i've only ever had movie theater popcorn and microwave popcorn. do you think i would like popcorn if i made it on the stove? or do you just recommend giving up on popcorn altogether?

Posted March 2nd by poptart!
poptart!
 

also i can see that you're very passionate about your popcorn, so i'm sorry if my previous post was out of line.

Posted March 2nd by poptart!
poptart!
 

I don't eat popcorn, but thanks.

>If you're so worried about calories that you weren't going to use real butter then you should've eaten carrots or fiber pills or whatever health conscious people usually sustain themselves on

Sun chips and granola.

Posted March 2nd by nullfather
nullfather

The phrase "lipstick on a pig" comes to mind. If you don't already like popcorn there's probably no changing your mind. I'm the kind of person that has choked down the fat free stuff and actually still liked it so that's sort of where I'm coming from.

With that said, I drown mine in butter and still have a BMI of 21. I have a hard time imagining someone not liking how I do it.

Posted March 2nd by Famov
Famov

So I went from not liking popcorn, to loving popcorn with butter, to being completely sick of popcorn, to loving popcorn without butter, to just enjoying it from time to time without butter. I dunno what it is. Something about butter doesn't work for me anymore.

Granted, I work at a movie theater, so I am constantly around popcorn. I'm also pretty immune to the smell.

Posted March 2nd by Jet Presto
Jet Presto

I would eat popcorn at movies with lots of salt and no butter. I didn't like buttered popcorn.

I haven't had popcorn in at least 5 years.

Posted March 2nd by Speed Bike Pro
Speed Bike Pro
 

i used to hate tomatoes, but then i started to like them on burgers, and now i love all tomatoes

Posted March 2nd by poptart!
poptart!
 

curveball: I use a hot air popper. Had some with lunch yesterday.

Posted March 2nd by Pirate_Ninja
Pirate_Ninja

Air popped is a respectable alternative. The rest of you disappoint me, I thought we were friends, etc. I mean, tomatoes. Next thing you'll tell me you like broccoli or something.

...To be fair that's how I got accustomed to tomatoes too. I still can't eat them on their own though, like my parents have a garden bursting with cherry tomatoes every year and they eat them like grapes. I can't do it.

Posted March 3rd by Famov
Famov

don't worry, famov, i would take a bacon cheeseburger with a fried egg on it over broccoli any day

Posted March 3rd by poptart!
poptart!
 

there's something oddly refreshing about biting into a fresh tomato

Posted March 3rd by poptart!
poptart!
 

Ah man, I really do like broccoli....

Posted March 3rd by Jet Presto
Jet Presto

cauliflower's where it's at budddddddd

Posted March 3rd by poptart!
poptart!
 

With that said, I drown mine in butter and still have a BMI of 21.

Fat doesn't cause weight gain, so that's not surprising.

Next thing you'll tell me you like broccoli or something.

Cooked broccoli with lots of butter or cheese is amazing.

I still can't eat them on their own though

I was like this until my dad grew some heirloom tomatoes in a lime-enriched soil base with a moisture wicking system. Every other tomato is like biting into heartburn-inducing water, but these days it just reminds me of what could have been

Also raw tomatoes + mayonnaise +salt is really really good. Same deal with cooked tomatoes +cheese.

Posted March 4th by Xhin
Xhin
Ignorance is strength, freedom is slavery

don't worry, famov, i would take a bacon cheeseburger with a fried egg on it over broccoli any day

I know what I want for lucnh

Posted March 4th by s.o.h.
s.o.h.
 

Also raw tomatoes + mayonnaise +salt is really really good
+ pepper

Keep your popcorn. Just give pretzels and a cold beer and I'm happy as a pig in shit.
Or chips and hot salsa.

Edited March 4th by chiefsonny
chiefsonny
 

The only thing I like more than butter is salt (and cheese; clearly I'm destined to live long). Once a year on my family's camping trip to Michigan's upper peninsula we have an afternoon dedicated to chips and homemade salsa and margaritas.

Posted March 4th by Famov
Famov

chips and homemade salsa and margaritas.


Don't get no better then that.

Posted March 4th by chiefsonny
chiefsonny
 

We have a Whirley Pop stovetop popper. The key to good popcorn is how hot the oil is BEFORE you put the popcorn on it. If the oil was just put in and the stove just turned on and you put the kernels in immediately, they will warm up too slowly and you'll wind up with many kernels unpopped. If you let the oil burn, your popcorn will start popping too fast and it won't cook properly (it will even taste stale and raw). But warm the oil for a couple seconds on a medium heat and you'll have stunning perfect popcorn cooked to perfection. No burns, no unpopped kernels, etc.

As far as butter goes, if you melt your butter and just drench the popcorn in it you lose the crunch. On top of that most of the butter will belt to the bottom which will be swimming in it. The butter needs to be coated lightly and evenly all over, along with fine grain salt to your liking. It will taste much more natural and wholesome than movie theater popcorn even if you screw up, but if you do it just right it will put movie theater popcorn to shame.

Edited March 4th by mariomguy
mariomguy
What up, 1-up
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