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looked up guides on "How to Move On"
Posted: Posted April 28th by tnu
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it's no wonder I don't take this concept seriously these tips are all useless the yr'e eit her thigns i'm already doing teidus chores i'me xpected to repeat until I die or not even remotely applicable to my situation they don't epxlaint he steps of how to get to the reward part of the process where I don't have to do it anymore.

Sir, just suppose... suppose if I had a cat, what would you do with Frankenstein?
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I dont really know what to say. I dont even know if I should bother saying anything. Based on my recent traumatic experience its hard.

Posted April 28th by S.O.H.
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looked up guides on "How to Move On"

Ya in my experience you don't move on from something really serious from your past from being told how, it just kind of happens naturally with time. Of course though, for some people they never move on entirely or it takes forever or they have an ideal that makes it even harder for them to move on.

Edited April 28th by Grey Echelon
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they don't epxlaint he steps of how to get to the reward part of the process where I don't have to do it anymore.

I'd argue your entire outlook is flawed if you think you can just follow steps 1, 2, 3 and then be 'done' with most things in life.

For example, let's say you go on a diet to lose some weight. You follow steps 1, 2, 3, and eventually you achieve your goal. Great! But if you don't actually learn something (ie: healthy eating habits, portion control, etc.) from the process, you're just going to end up right back where you started. To be successful, you have to make meaningful, long-term changes in your life.

Similarly, it's not enough to just "go to therapy" if you're treating it as a task to cross off a list toward a goal. If you're not making an effort and taking something meaningful away from it, you're just wasting your time and dooming yourself to failure.

Posted April 28th by Count Dooku
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"Moving on" is a personal process that requires emotional engagement, internal struggle and personal improvement and not just a literal series of physical actions.

Posted April 28th by afgjsgdh
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I'd argue your entire outlook is flawed if you think you can just follow steps 1, 2, 3 and then be 'done' with most things in life.



Then we agree "moving on" is a waste of time uit just sounds like the same grief b ut wi th extra unwanted repetitive and tedious steps that ultimately don't provide any value to me. Jus another repetitive chore. I can cut oput these extra chores without losign anything of value.

Edited April 28th by tnu
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tnu
 

Then we agree "moving on" is a waste of time

As you're doing it, yes. Because it appears your mindset avoids anything approaching introspection or personal growth in favor of checking boxes off a list.

Posted April 28th by Count Dooku
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I can save the energy these repetative chorse cost me on somethign I value more highly which is jsut about anything else. The concept is going to need a much better pitch as it stands it's just extra work with no payoff.

Edited April 28th by tnu
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tnu
 

I can get the same results by rolling a boulder up a hill for all eternity or other unwanted chores.

Edited April 28th by tnu
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tnu
 

I can get the same results by rolling a boulder up a hill for all eternity or other unwanted chores.


You have no idea how happy I am that you used this example.

"One must imagine Sisyphus happy."

I have faced loss, depression and hardship - as have many people, to some degree. Yet, I am now happy and I keep moving forward, even though I faced suicidal depression and obsessive behavior for years. Why is that?

Albert Camus said in his essay "The Myth of Sisyphus" that there is only one true philosophical question: whether or not to commit suicide. Years before hearing about this, I experienced it. I was at the clearest turning point in my life, one with only two options. I chose to live; ever since, I have been moving upward.

I have been rolling the boulder up the hill for years. The reason I do it is not simple: I do it because it makes me stronger; I do it because I like doing it; I do it because it is more interesting than withering away at the bottom of the hill, having accomplished nothing even as meagerly meaningful as having pushed a boulder; I do it because it is a representation of having chosen to live and a representation of all of the aspects of continuing life. Someday, I won't be able to push the boulder anymore. It will roll back down to the bottom, right where it started. That's OK, because it wasn't the action of rolling the boulder that was important. I don't need to get the boulder to the top of the hill. What was important was the internal choices and values that rolling the boulder symbolizes.

I can't really tell you all of the exact psychological mechanics that played out in my head over a period of decades. But I can tell you that I went from obsessive and suicidal to happy and flexible and that this is how I look at it.

Posted April 28th by srtjashe
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yeah I was invokign Camus actually.

Posted April 28th by tnu
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tnu
 
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